I have heard of Kimball’s Sos Cili, Maggi’s Sos Cili and Lingam’s Sos Cili. But for the first time today, I heard of Tony Pua’s Sos Cili or better known as ‘Sis-Chillies’.
I was quite intrigued because never have I bumped into any sauce of such brand. Plus having Tony Pua endorsing the chilli sauce himself, I thought, “Wow, this must be spicy, as spicy as the 1MDB case!”
So I embarked on my mini adventure and drove through the evening traffic madness to get to Mid Valley Megamall. The first location I headed to was Aeon Big. I thought since it’s called ‘BIG’, by right they should have ALL brands of sauces, right? But nope, I couldn’t find the special ‘Sis-Chillies’ sauce.
Then I hoped over to Aeon Jusco. Found Sarawak Black Pepper sauce but not Tony Pua’s ‘Sis-Chillies’ sauce. Sigh. What a bummer.
Nope. I ain’t giving up yet.
So I embraced myself, walked through the sea of people and headed to Cold Storage at the Gardens. I thought being ‘the place’ where rich folks shop, surely I would find the amazingly-not-easy-to-get Tony Pua’s ‘Sis-Chillies’.
Darn it. It wasn’t there either!
This was totally unacceptable. Why mention something when it is not available? Or perhaps it was an exclusive brand belonging to an exclusive store?
Yes! Why didn’t I think of it before – surely ‘Sis-Chillies’ is only marketed in the Chilli’s chain of restaurants!
I made a few phone calls to Chilli’s Bangsar, Chilli’s KLCC and Chilli’s Empire – no one heard of ‘Sis-Chillies’. Seriously?
By the time I got back to my car, I was already 100% craving for this special ‘Sis-Chillies’ sauce. I wanted it splashed lavishly on my burger. I wanted it clinging to my hot, oily fries. I wanted it squeezed all over my omelette. I wanted to pour it into my ayam masak merah.
I know my obsession was getting out of hand but I couldn’t help it. I was getting desperate. Oh god, my hands and legs began shaking uncontrollably. I needed it. I needed it so bad.
All the way home, I tried to keep my head straight and focus on the road. I couldn’t stop thinking of Tony’s ‘Sis-Chillies’ wondering how it would taste. Could it be as spicy as ‘cili boh’? Or maybe even better than Tobasco sauce?
As soon as I got home, I re-played the video on Tony Pua’s press statement again. I had to gather more clues about the whereabouts of this sauce.
Finally, when I saw the video the fourth time, my heart sank. My world went dark.
Darn it. Rupa-rupanya, the special ‘Sis-Chillies’ sauce has been transferred to Cayman Islands by a guy called Jho Low.
I guess there is no way for me to get my hands on Tony’s ‘Sis-Chillies’ sauce anymore.
Oh. By the way, if you are travelling to Cayman Islands, perhaps you can look for Tony’s special ‘Sis-Chillies’ sauce there. It is spelt ‘Seychelles’ although Tony pronounces it diferently.
Tony, Tony, Tony… as an Oxford graduate, you have proven that no one is perfect in such a funny way! Thanks to you, I will never be able to pronounce Seychelles as it is anymore – prefer your version of ‘Sis-Chillies’. Adoi, my perut so sakit laughing every time I hear you say the word.
For those who have missed the video, you can always catch it here at https://vimeo.com/121756730
Anyway Tony, thank you for doing such a great job especially in exposing the recent 1MDB scandal. I surely hope that with your great dedication comes a great sense of humour.
“When you become a politician, even the cat on the road has got the right to criticise (and make fun of) you.”
~ Samy Vellu